Motherhood and the Ocean

Several months ago I was thinking of writing a blog post called “Life Without a To-Do List.” It’s not that I don’t have one. It’s just that I don’t exactly have time to look at it most days. But then last night I had this idea, which I think might express it better.

Being a mother is like standing on the beach, looking out at the ocean. And having the cutest, sweetest, and happiest baby in your arms. (Seriously, Micah laughed with glee for five minutes straight last night when his Daddy got home from work.) You watch the waves come in, and every one brings in a new crop of beautiful seashells. Those seashells are things you want to do, things you used to do, and they sparkle and glitter in the sunlight. You want to gather them up, but you have a baby in your arms. Every now and again you can grab one, but it requires a deft move, and you can only grab the smallest one–usually it’s cooking dinner or making a birthday card.

As each wave comes in, you make a mental list of the shells–the things you’ll add to your to-do list, which is mostly a fun list. You might grab one shell, but then a new wave comes right in, bringing new shells that make you forget about the ones that were already there. As the wave rolls back out to sea, the shells are washed in every direction on the sand, mixing them all up.

In order to gather them all, you’d have to put the baby down and pull up your skirt to use as a damp and sandy bag for them. But you’re busy looking into sweet blue eyes and rubbing the softest head of blonde hair you’ve ever felt. You’re listening for coos and cries and shrieks of baby glee. Each night you head back home from the beach to sleep, and you leave the shells behind, gleaming in the moonlight. “Oh yeah,” you think, “I was going to go the library. And I wanted to finish knitting that blanket.” But you leave these shells for tomorrow.

Each day, like each wave, brings new shells, and you admire them, even though you can’t reach for them, not just yet. You can’t complain because you are so very happy. You’re at the beach, watching the ocean, tasting the salt in the air, smiling at someone you love more than you can even comprehend. Those shells will still be there when he’s walking and talking and ready to collect them with you. Until then, collect some for me. Enjoy them, just as I’m enjoying this sweet baby time.

December 2014 Goals

December, you are a fun one. And you’re going to be a busy one! We have all kinds of exciting stuff planned, so I’m trying to keep the goals short and sweet.

My first goal is to finish something I started last month–A Week in the Life. I have photos and text for Monday through Wednesday up on Micah’s blog already, so I am almost halfway there. Hopefully I can get it finished during a good nap or two. I want to finish it before I forget that week in all its sweet and funny goodness.

I also want to finish my final painting from the Bloom True class I took last year. I have two out of three done, and my motivation to finish the third is partly that the family who are visiting this month can help us hang them on our really high living room wall. (This will involve a ladder and some couch-shifting.)

I didn’t bake for Thanksgiving, and that’s totally okay, but I do have a few things in mind for the holidays. And hopefully it will be cool enough outside that we’ll be happy to have the oven on too.

Of course, I am looking forward to Micah’s first Christmas! My family will be here with us for the first time, and I am really excited about it! (And I am really happy we’ll have a big enough table to seat them all–IKEA, here we come!)

Obviously, I want to take a million pictures–some candids, but also some family Christmas shots, which are a fun tradition.

I never really gave much thought to the the new year until I started choosing a word for the year and setting a few big goals for each one. I feel very focused on the day-to-day right now, which is a beautiful thing, but I am also looking forward to thinking about the bigger picture and asking myself what I want to focus on in 2015, personally and professionally. Hoping to have some time to talk it through with family over the holidays.

That’s all for December! Please share a link in the comments if you are posting monthly goals too! I’ll be back in January with a progress report. November goals have been updated here. December 2012 goals are here, and December 2013 goals are here.