12 May 2014
And so we have arrived at the stage in pregnancy when people smile at me and congratulate me and ask me when I am due. Hurray! Also, the baggers at the grocery store really want to make sure I’m okay taking them to the car myself. And I am, for now, but I will ask for help when I need it. (Also, major thanks to Hillary for lending me this maternity dress, which is one of the few things I can still fit into!)
I have had a gentle inauguration into the third trimester so far. I would not say that I had any great burst of energy in the second trimester, but now I am definitely more tired than I was then. Oh well. Also, I now have a new nightly companion: heartburn. It is unpleasant…but so much more pleasant than some other things I’ve experienced already (ahem, entire first trimester, I’m talking about you). The baby is still rocking and rolling in there, which is really sweet to feel. My mobility is still very good except on the occasions when he drops his entire body to the bottom of my uterus. And then, my friends, I waddle.
It was a big weekend for us: we bought a car! It’s a new-to-us Honda Accord. Given that we are still driving the Honda Civic I bought when I was 16, I hope we’ll have a good long time with this one too. Eric worked really hard to prep for the inspection and negotiation, and he did the most amazing job. I was seriously impressed. I said a few things here and there, but he really had it under control. We feel great about the car and the price we negotiated, and we’re happy to be able to cross this off our list. Now to install the carseat!
It was also a really special weekend because we celebrated Mother’s Day as parents for the first time. I didn’t have any expectations at all–I hoped that maybe Eric would buy me flowers (and he did!), but otherwise I hadn’t imagined anything special. Eric also gave me a card from our baby, and it made me cry profusely. It was the sweetest, sweetest thing, and I will treasure it forever. It was a total surprise, which made it even more moving.
Speaking of moving, our parish usually honors mothers on Mother’s Day, but I never paid too much attention to it. Until now. At mass the priest offered a special prayer for us, and then invited us to come up and receive a flower. I was already crying–finding my place in the long line of mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers and women throughout all of time who have loved and nurtured their children is enough to knock me off my feet. And I was just so grateful. I have wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember. I dreamed for years and years about being married and having a family. When I was younger, I imagined that this would happen right away, and while I am older than I imagined I would be, I would not change a thing. Being able to get pregnant is a gift. Having a healthy pregnancy is a gift. Being in a good place in life to welcome a child is a gift. And having a loving and caring and supportive partner to share it with you is a gift. Every single one of them is priceless. As I was walking back to our pew with my flower in my hand, my eyes fell on Eric, smiling so sweetly and proudly at me, and I just absolutely lost it, the way I lost it right before I walked down the aisle at our wedding: tears that are just a rushing well of joy overflowing, tears that express gratitude better than any words can, tears that hold the greatest hope and happiness for the future.
I am looking forward to years with finger-painted Mother’s Day cards and picnics in the park and years when Mother’s Day will coincide with graduations, and years (deep breath) when I will hopefully get to enjoy my children and my grandchildren. And I’m even looking forward to the years when my children might rather be off with their friends than hanging out with me, because Mother’s Day will always make me remember this weekend, this wonderful time of waiting and celebrating, the last weeks of our first child remaining a beautiful mystery, before we can stroke his soft skin and hear his newborn cries.